People/Things that piss me off

This being my first post, I reckon it is important for you to know about the things that piss me off. If you associate yourself with any of the below, I strongly believe you should try this.

Major turnoffs :




1) Dogs chasing speeding cars.

This usually happens during nights. This 'nautanki' of dogs is only on city roads. Hit the Formula 1 tracks you moronic hounds.







2) The 'shhhh...' sound that parents make while their offsprings are busy in washrooms.

Yes. You and I have gone through this.







3) Emran Hashmi.

I do not want to speak about this guy. If I were to be the director, I would've made him the villan and killed him in Take 1 - Scene 1. Go look at yourself in the mirror, you chicken. You're not even road worthy, let alone a camera.





4) The irregular/random arrangement of letters on the keyboard.

Christopher Sholes , the man behind the QWERTY keyboard.
He has a soft corner towards the letters G-H, K-L, O-P(He has put these together). I vow to unravel the conspiracy.








5) Tubelight like smile(You know, those people with really white teeth)

Yes. It gives me a complex.









6) Silent air conditioners. They dont make their presence felt. How unsocial.

Just imagine : You are feeling pretty warm inside your home. The temperature reads 25 degrees. You dont know whether your AC is switched on or not. Worse, you dont realise that you have an AC because it makes no noise. Chuck these. Atleast fans give you that 'Wooosh' sound.






7) Square-shape compact discs

I will stop using computers if any such thing is released into the market.









8) Slow moving turtles.

Turtles are really, really useless. You cant blow 'em up. You cant fire them. They can't run, they can't fly.










9) 4 lines(unnecessary) of electric wires runing over my home.

Well, what can I say? Yes, you agree with me right? One is enough. Ok. Let's try 2(A spare one). I don't get the logic behind 4 of these. And, they run some shock inducing stuff inside these wires so that no one takes away the other two. Clever.








10) The small fan that sits on my CPU which keeps the ants and spiders inside the metal-box happy.
This is unnecessary unless you want to breed ants and spiders inside your Cabinet. Elsewhere, people die due to excess heat. And here, they have fans for ants! Zamaana bigadgaya hai bhaai!










11) Bicycle thieves.
These are bad guys. I don't fancy telling you about them. They are bad.










12) Low disk space.
I have a 24 GB hard-disk. I get this message now and then. There were days when computers worked with 1 MB hard disk space. Today's computers are a pampered lot. I hate this avarice.







13) The danger sign

Scary.












14) Editor of a daily who keeps a column to himself.
Editors of dailies are the most irritating lot. They reckon they are the best writers and keep a column to themselves. And all they write is this ->












15) Silent doorbells

Doorbells of this size would be suitable for quiet homes. I don't fancy these.












16) Ringing doorbells.


Yes. I hate doorbells.












17) The letter 'Q'. It's queer, I know.

'Q' should be removed from the set of English alphabets. We can move it to, say, Hebrew.







18) F8. I haven't used that key till date(Hmmm... Twice, I think)
Still... Useless






19) Distance between the Sun and the moon

Yes. I think the distance between the Sun and the moon is a tad too much. I am happy with the distance between the earth and the Sun though.












20) Cocunuts descending at 9.8 metres/second from a cocunut tree.













21) Elephants that go Bungee jumping.















22) People who write reams of 'Things that piss me off' stuff.











23) You

Yes. ' You ' read it right, Idiot.













24) One final thing that pisses us all... The loo









Still scrolling down? ' You ' figured up there at no 23. Go away!